The place of discipline

My Master has been rebuilding his home and in so doing he felt the time had come to think about the basement area that has served assorted needs, among them a place to send the girl when she was disciplined. The new design of the space will be partitioned rather than one open space that previously existed. In talking about the design, we spoke about the impact of spaces on the psychology of the slave.

In considering this I realized that space and atmosphere (dank cavern, cage, post in the village square) made little difference to me in affecting my mood when subject to discipline, rather it was the state of mind, the actions, the timing.

Why is it both incredibly scary and incredibly exciting (all at once and mixed together) to have my Master take me to a place where I know I will likely be subject to his discipline?

In exploring this mystery, my mind wandered back to the dysfunctional way men and women sometimes argue with each other. What happens when a woman crosses the line with a man she loves? More than likely he storms away slamming the door after him. She doesn't know if he has left for good. She cries. She feels abandoned. She may feel angry and not listened to. No understanding is achieved. She is unlikely to seek within herself as to how she might have handled things differently. She is too preoccupied with pain, loss, dread, confusion, anger.

Alternatively if her lover snaps, looses control (the opposite of Mastery) and lashes out physically at her, this will simply shock and hurt her. It will be too much violence with no rationale, and she will shut down, confident that she is in the right. He is the villain in the piece. Spousal abuse is NOT Mastery.

In either case, if they make up later, they may have passionate make-up sex clinging to each other, so happy that the argument hasn't destroyed the passion at their heart, but has any real communication happened. Has any power balance that needed to shift happened? No. The pitfall is still there and they will stumble on it again in future.

Arguments arise at the fault lines in relationships. Like faults in the earths plates, lava bubbles to the surface with steam and heat. It is the place where two individuals meet unyielding obstacles in each other and earthquakes ensue. Ultimately, one plate must slide over the other. One must yield.

Our differences create the energy between us, the polarities for the sparks of fun, sensuality, passion. Having none would be boring. Taking that energy to the edge but not beyond is an art, a dance, a dangerous sport. It is not something that can be achieved in the dark, not something that can be done without words to each other.

My Master bids me to be myself and so I will be. I love him very much and sometimes a sudden glimpse of him very instinctively brings me to my knees without as much as thinking, eager to please and serve him. I really want to please. I cherish my time with him and honour what he is to me, my Master.

But sometimes aspects of who I am irritates him and I will try this way and that to get on a different track, to achieve my objective in another way that doesn't get him cross, only to make him angrier yet. I am lost, off the path and need a strong hand to guide me back.

Other times something in me makes me run at the rock that is him with all my force, knowing I am headed for trouble but I can't seem to stop myself not because of lack of control but simply because my ego or emotional needs are on a collision course with my Master's and until that plays out, there will be no peace for me or him.

If reason and talking could sort it out, we'd never have difficulties as we are intelligent and communicative people. But sometimes motivations, needs, fears and irrational worries are deeply buried and control us against our own best interests. These are places where in an equal relationship, long struggles that potentially would poison or end love occur. A partner throws up his or her hands and leaves.

A Master will have none of it.

When I see that my Master will have none of it, something in my heart jumps for joy. At the same time I tremble because I know I am in for a hard lesson and I am not sure what it will be or how hard it will be for me to truly bend to my Master's will in the matter. I know that faking it is not possible. Whatever happens next... in the next few minutes, or over the next several days... I know that he is determined that when he is done with me I will be returned to my knees as his loving slave. He will accept no lessor outcome.

A Master is not going to walk out the door permanently or lose his temper and abuse a slave senselessly. A kajira is a treasure like a beautiful bonsai to be shaped by a combination of love, nurture and firm steel. Instead of childish emotional outbursts, he will use his many skills as a Master and his knowledge of his girl to explore and root out the behaviour that is causing distress. He is going to force me to listen and understand his preferences and in the course of this exploration we will not only learn much about each other but the interplay of the energies and the transfer of power will be deliciously erotic and intense at times.

The collision energies build to a peak and the girl sees from the look in the Master's eyes, a tone of voice, a sudden hand gesture, or a dismissal that he has had enough and that her efforts to curb the behaviour (if she has) have not been enough. It is then that he moves suddenly or as quickly as possible in the circumstances to remove her from her place at his boots. She is bound or chained or caged away from him. And that is the key thing about her condition as a precursor of punishment. She is taken away from him for a time. This breaks the cycle of collision. She has nothing to rail at, no one to protest or cry or query or complain to. There is only silence and the place where she is comfined.

What is the attitude of the angry, hostile woman? Arms crossed over breasts, she will cover the sensitive buds that her male Master knows will bend her to his will. Her stance is sideways, tall, proud, turning her sex away from the Master's cock, fending him off with a hip. This is the natural pose an angry woman adopts.

The slave to be punished is secured in an attitude that the Master assesses will make her feel the most vulnerable and disabuse her of her destructive delusion that she can control him in any way. For me, not being able to see clearly what the Master might do focuses my attention in both a calming and erotic way, like hooding a hawk. Bending me over a bench, head away, my hair cascading over my face, the Master secures my feet apart, my hands stretched forward. It is a position where I might be sexually used, spanked or whipped on back and legs. My breasts hang freely and I can not cover them. My head is lower than my behind, in the position of the submissive pup. It is one of several positions that I might be left to wonder what will happen next.

At this point the Master may have the time and inclination to begin to work with the girl immediately, but he may think it best to think for awhile. The sight of his girl bound and quivering, tugging futilely at her bonds, perhaps still in the heat of her anger making futile curses at him, is an amusing and delightful challenge to the Masterly instinct in him. He loves to see her fire and looks forward to how she will soon buck under him. He smiles at her flashing angry eyes but thinks that they do look slightly more pretty, heavy-lidded and adoringly glancing up at him with her mouth wide open around his cock. Moving over to the bound girl, the Master traces the beautiful curve of her flesh from her shapely neck, down her back, glistening with faint drops of sweat from her anger and fear. He cups the round of her firm bottom and sees the cheeks clench involuntarily in their familiarity with the force of his discipline.

With one hand he explores the condition of her heat, tight, dry, only one finger pries into her. With the other hand he takes the coiled whip from his belt and allows her to feel the coil as he rubs it over her back. As she feels the whip's closeness, the girl trembles and the Master notices her heat moistening, loosening, opening to him. This is the sign of a girl ready and eager for the Master's discipline, becoming receptive and ready to have her wrong attitudes stripped from her and to listen and learn new obedient behaviours. Her pussy relaxes to take as much of the Master's hand he chooses to use to force her chamber while he thumbs and twists her nipples into a state of gratifying attention.

From this starting attitude of readiness and attention the Master will begin, now, or at his leisure to probe the fault line in his girl. He will ask her questions. Wrong answers will be punished. Displays of rebellion will often be dispersed by taking the girl sexually during the session. Sex is both a reward and a reminder that she is owned at these times. He will reveal his own thoughts on the matters. The girl will emerge knowing that the Master's will on these issues cannot be challenged. It will not be a matter of a daily painful choice to "try" to do what pleases him. She simply will be convinced body and soul that this is an issue that is not winnable. Sometimes she may even learn things about why the issue is important to her Master... things she was not ready to listen to any other way that changes her heart and mind through understanding. She need not be broken to obey. In any case, the problem is vanquished.

She is returned to her knees, his loving slave again. She has learned more of him and he of her. There may be other challenges but this one will not plague them again . . . or at least. . . if there is a relapse, the understanding is there to curb it quickly.

There is only so long you can dance or write solo

My writing output has been sputtering to a halt lately because for me the most important audience member I have for these writings is my own Master and whether because of busyness or because I have become boring and non-spontaneous to him... I seem to be too reflective, or to wish for more planning sometimes... he has been absent.

He is my inspiration and without him, there is nothing to write about.

The other day I asked him how I could please him and he told me just to be myself. On one hand that was such a nice and affirming thing to say and I am sure he meant it as such. We submissives bring personality, a mind, opinions, and talents to the M/s relationship for sure.

But what attracts us to a Master is that we sense that we need and want to be shaped to his pleasure. We don't want to fight the man that has won our hearts and brought us to our knees. We give up freedom to no longer live in suspense about when we have pleased or displeased, how we may serve, what we can strive to do better. We expect to be told clearly.

A Master who is no longer interested in doing that, has released us ... in his heart, by his actions, whether the formalities have been done or not.

My leash dangles from my collar without a tug. I hope to feel his strong hand again. But for the moment I feel sad, lost, rudderless.. and gentle readers... have nothing to write about.

The lessons learned from simmering

The simmering girl is chained at her Master's boots naked and in heat. He pats her head soothingly, seeing her need, but does not choose to use her that day. She flushes and squirms with her hands imprisoned above her, unable to pleasure herself, her face blushing pink with desire and embarassment at the obviousness of her desire. But her Master reassures her that there is nothing to be ashamed of and that he is very, very pleased to see her slave fires rise and the heat of her desire to serve him. It is simply his choice that she not serve him that way right now. Although it would be pleasant indeed, it is his decision that she learn what it is to feel intense desire and to be deprived of gratification.

Sometimes such training is accompanied by the Master signalling that the girl will be required to pleasure him with her mouth. There is nothing that is more effective in training a a pleasure slave... and more difficult for her... than to demand an expert, loving and thorough blowjob while the slave is in heat. The hot spurts of cum on her face will mix with her tears of disappointment and frustration.

On Earth women have the upper hand in sexual encounters, witholding and granting sexual favours. This works against them training themselves to be as responsive as possible to men and against their own sexual pleasure. Nature does not need women to enjoy sex, only to have sexual urges. The fact is that men become aroused much more readily than women. Women have scant opportunity to develop their capacity to become aroused on cue and are socialized to think that they do not need to develop that ability. Instead they believe that they can choose to have sex only on the few occasions when they become aroused. Therein lies the tension that will destroy many relationships and lead women astray and away from their own enjoyment. It is really a lie that earth women are told by society. In practice, most women find that to keep a relationship they will have to surrender control of when they are fucked, to rebel will drive their male partner away. But because they have this fiction of control in their minds, they respond to their partners with lukewarm, confused acquiscience rather than the passionate response a Gorean Master elicits with his strong hand and his aura of masculine dominance.

My Master is definitely not only the Master of this girl but the Master of himself, therefore he keeps the girl in a constant state of sexual simmering to assure her devotion and obedience.

In the first occasions of such training a kajira will sometimes become quite angry, threaten to run or voice inappropriate thoughts. She may protest that she has a "right" to be pleasured. Such rebellion must be dealt with as all rebellion is dealt with, summarily without much ado. Too severe punishments signal that the Master is insecure. A Master who is in full control will laugh at some rebellious thoughts from his girl, view others as crazy talk that must be silenced and response to others with the minimum and most efficient of corrective actions. A girl threatening to run will be caged or chained. A mouthy girl will be gagged, and so on. At no time does a Master argue with a slave.

A Master demands that his slave not only pleasure him as he wishes, when he wishes but to be fully responsive to his touch. He delights in playing the supple body of his girl as he would a fine instrument. He does not want a piece of dead wood under his hands, a puppet going through the motions but rather a creature of fire and passion, sexual energy singing in her blood under his skilled hands.

The slave learns to recondition her responses to her Master's pleasure rather than her own by being taken without permission but perhaps even more by being denied sexual gratification when she is desperate for it.

As she is forced to remain in a state of arousal without gratification for as long as the Master dictates, she thinks about her need for the Master's hands on her, the pleasure that it is to have his cock within her. The tables are totally turned on her earth expectations and she learns what it is to beg to be released from sexual tension. Only when the girl learns that she has no control over when her Master will choose to take his pleasure with her, does she begin to learn to respond instantly to the occasions when he chooses her as the instrument to serve his desires. It hardly needs to be said that a girl whose thoughts are often turned to how she might be found to be desirable by the Master, how she might arouse his desire and interest, is going to struggle to be obedient and pleasing in all things and struggle not to displease her Master in any detail.

Trust

It is one of the contradictions of this relationship that the collar is supposed to replace any need for trust. Afterall the girl is owned, the Master doesn't need to trust her. She will do as she is bidden or else.

And yet it is so human to want at least something that is freely given of the heart, and to be able to trust that thing. And it feels so hard to trust without power, when one wears the collar, and perhaps so hard to trust that one who simmers in a collar is truly one who loves and cares and can be relied upon.

I find this quite confusing but long for my Master to know that he can trust me to be honest with him. It breaks my heart when I feel any distrust from him.

Kajira, from a Master's perspective

I came across an excellent post from a Gorean Master today. I could not agree more with his description of the relationship between Master and slave, and as I read the words I thought that they could have been written by my Master as they were deeply in tune with his thoughts as I understand them.

(excerpted)

"If I were to be asked to describe a kajira in as few words as possible, asked to sum up the whole concept of a Gorean slave in two words, I would say: a treasure. To me, a slave is something to be valued, to be fussed over and adored, as well as to be served by. A kajira is property, is owned by her Master; once she wears his collar, she is his heart body and soul, which is why it is important that both Master and slave be sure of what they want before the collar clicks closed. . . ."

Great piece!

Kajira from a Master's Perspective.

The scent and aura of a well-mastered girl

Lately I have been noticing that I am getting along with the men in all aspects of my life much better than before and the only thing that I can think of that has changed is that I have been Mastered.

I don't believe my overt behaviour has changed but obviously something has. I have a theory about that. While most men intellectually do not have a problem with the equality of women, they have a strong biological imperative to reproduce. To impregnate as many women as possible they have evolved as stronger and larger and their hormones make them want to dominate women and they have a deep expectation that women will bend to their sexual wills. Women that are sexually dominant or equal, challenge them at a level far below the conscious mind. It unsettles them and they want to "put that woman in her place". I think that they might have to create rationales for their dislike, ascribing negative labels to the woman that may well be unfair. I expect that has happened to me on occasion.

But now I walk in the world knowing that I am totally owned and submissive to a man who is my Master. I am so conditioned as his sub that I cannot think of him without wanting to kneel. I can't think of him without feeling his hands on me and his cock plowing me. I cannot lick my lips without tasting his rod.

There may be subtle changes in my demeanor. If I caught a man looking at my boobs before I would have tended to flash an angry look. Now my response is to be pleased that I am female and I don't find the glance offensive but a bit of a compliment. If I respond at all it will be to blush a little and to adjust my posture to one of more grace. Before if a male boss or superior corrected me, I might flash anger or hostility at him. Now I have a response like a Master spanking me. I take the correction with appropriate shame that it needs to be administered and I am sincere in my apology and wish to do better in future. I affirm the power in the hand that wields various whips in the world.

Don't get me wrong, I have not become a tart or a flirt. Nor am I easy to push around in areas where I have rightly earned respect. My nature has not radically changed. But I believe I now no longer threaten men at a subliminal level. Although our human socialization means that unlike Gor men do not have permission to take any woman that they can Master, I am now one that exudes and communicates the message that I am Mastered. I am tamed. This is pleasing, harmonious and soothing to the nature of most men who are conditioned to be sexually dominant. Feeling the truth of my submissive nature, they no longer see my achievements or leadership in other areas to be threatening to their rightful place within the human pack.

I am female, submissive and know my place in the human pack, following my Master, in his shadow and covered by his strong self.

The biggest online-ism of all? Classes for Masters

I was chuckling this week at the thought of what would happen in a Gorean city if someone circulated scrolls demanding or strongly suggesting that all male citizens were in need of lessons in how to be a Gorean Master, in particular how to handle their girls. Depending on the circumstance I think that the presumptious one might well find himself summarily tossed in the river to cool his over-heated brain.

But on second thought, if the self-proclaimed expert were anyone with real power, likely he would get the same reception in Gor as such folks do in Second Life Gor. People would listen politely, nod their heads respectfully in all the right places.... and then do as they pleased.

Gor was portrayed as a world of polite people who did not go out of their way to make enemies. But also a world of rugged individualists. Therefore, this kajira takes here lead from her own Master and knows her own Master knows how to be a Master led by the fire within.