Feeling unwanted and lonely is a hard test for a girl

Recently I came to my Master and I just seemed to irritate him and be in the way as his mind was on other things: building, preparing things for roleplay, etc. That's been happening a fair bit recently and I have in the past had a tendency to panic and cling and write desperate missives. All of which just makes him more irritated and exhausted with me. So what to do?

Well I neither want to push it, nor appear to go off in a snit. Not only would either action be pointless, my heart is not in it. Either he wants me or he doesn't and time will tell.

There are a few things I need to work on both for us and for other projects of mine, so my plan is just to focus on stuff I need to get done in both worlds, try to keep in a happy frame of mind and feel like I am giving him one of the biggest gifts that a kajira (who has nothing material) can give a Master--the gift of some space away from his girl.

It's a very hard thing for a loving girl to do.

The Master's voice

Silence is cold
but my Master's voice rolls over me like warm waves
rumbling rivulets swirl around me in the safe harbour of his sphere
I come to his arms and burrow into the roughness of a homespun cloak
and I am home

A kajira is a jewel

"You will open like a flower", I was told
under the gentle care of a lover's smiling sun
and his tender tilling of your garden
watering you with his loving
spreading your petals

I don't know when these flowers lived
with their gentle gardeners
I think it must have been in the Paleozoic,
Or was it the Mesozoic?
I know it was Before-me-a-zoic.

These days as the flowers bloom
they get covered fast by the weight of years
layers of civilization's crap in a crushing load
squeezes any hint of tenderness from their buds
humanity's shit heap, crushing any life

The unexpected twists of fate gather up some
And fold them in the pressure-cooker of metamorphosis
Carbon lumps they are fired in the furnace of stress and time
Hard diamonds of potential with the flower locked within

Sometimes a Master finds such a hardened lump
smiles and sees into its heart
Here is the cleft line that will free what is within
Strike too swiftly and all could be lost in dust
But strike just once and the beauty will start to be freed

A diamond without fault lines is useless for gem stones
The Master finds what he wants and carves away the rest
At last the lost and crushed flower blooms warmly in his hand
a jewel he has found and earned.

A Master knows when a kajira is paying attention

A Master sees his girl busy in the kitchen preparing food for his table and sees that her nipples revealed through her camisk are flaccid and relaxed. His brow furrows. He steps behind the girl and under her camisk, cupping one of her ripe melons in his hand and teasing the nipple to attention.

"Girl, are you thinking of your Master and how you are serving your Master with your work?"

"Yes, Master" the girl stammers.

The Master teases her nipple further and switches to give the other breast the same attention. With his other hand, he explores the girl's heat and the hard pear of her womb jumps in responsiveness.

"Do you need to feel the Master's rod between your legs girl, to remind you that you are owned?"

The girl's face flushes, her eyes hood and she moans, "this one longs to please the Master".

The Master laughs and gives her rump a swift hard slap, "You are serving me, girl by making me dinner. This is your pleasure, is it not, to serve?"

"Yes, Master" the girl says, a little disappointed.

"Then let me see the evidence of your delight in serving. I expect to see your face shining and the evidence of your pleasure in serving in your posture and the way your nipples rise as you think about your service. The evidence of your devotion in little things will make me want to plow your valley and fill you with my pleasure at your service. Understand girl?" and with a smart swot to her backside the Master sends the slave back to the hearth.

The female submissive responds instinctively to the presence of her Master with erect nipples. It is something that is hard to suppress or to falsify. Therefore the wise Master keeps his girls' breasts bared as much as possible or takes care to dress them in fabric that reveals the perky state of his slaves' buds. While attention may ebb and flow with concentration to work, a Master needs to attend to a girl who shows little responsiveness in his presence. Her submission and responsiveness is lagging and she needs to be brought to the edge again by whatever means his knowledge of her, skills and preferences as a Master dictates.